Excuse me as I'm sweaty and covered in dust as I type. (Not that you can see that or care, but just thought I'd give you the whole picture of this post.)

I just returned from another fun-filled day in the village where, today, I taught the kids to play "Duck, Duck, Goose" and "Red Rover." We even did a mixed game (boys and girls) for "DDG." (Yep, I'm a rebel.) The children loved it and it was great for me to see the boys and girls playing together.

When our time was up, we all headed back down the hillside to their homes and our vehicle. I pretty much heard giggles and laughter the entire descent. This was just what I needed.

Because...

Today I was also a bit homesick. Not in the sense of wanting out of this place, but in the sense that my family is all hanging out on the lake right now and I wish I was there too. Now, I know that what I'm doing is important and valuable--blah,blah, blah. But I also know that it's times like this that my choice to be here becomes a little more difficult. The cost a little more visible.

It's ok.

Right now I am just grateful for the laughter of those children. For whatever the sacrifice, they are precious reminders that...

IT'S WORTH IT.
THEY are worth it.
HE is worthy.

Last night I had a date with this little guy and his baby brother--who is not pictured because he fell asleep in my arms at 7:30pm. (I have that affect on men. ;)

Anyway, it was B & J's 15th Wedding Anniversary, so I offered to babysit so they could have a night out on the town.

We made popcorn. Ate junk food. And watched "Ice Age 2." (Aren't I the greatest sitter?!)

When the movie finished, D was already practically asleep on my lap. So I changed his diaper, brushed his teeth, and laid him in his bed. I'm pretty sure he was out as soon as I said "amen" to his bedtime prayer, so I don't think there was any need to worry that he'd eaten too much sugar.

Afterwards I went back to my room to read until their parents returned. I thought about how precious these little guys are and how grateful I am to be a part of their lives. I thought about how I may never have the privilege of being someone's "mommy," BUT I have been blessed several times over in being quite a few little someone's "LoLo." And that is enough to make one's heart very full.

So if you are one of those people who've allowed me the joy of being a part of your child's life...Thank You! My cup runneth over.

There are times when it seems as though my prayers are never going to be answered. Or, at least not in my lifetime. And then there are times when I pray and 2 hours later God shows up and totally knocks my socks off with His speedy reply and astounding goodness.

Today I experienced the later.

Yesterday I sent an email to the lady in charge of my finances asking if I could get $300 or $400 extra for this coming month, as I'm leaving to go on break.
This morning she had replied informing me that she could do that. However, she didn't know if she would then be able to give me the regular amount for August as the funds are low.

Great.

Enter "Not-So-Spiritual" me. (Luckily I was alone in my room.)

My mind immediately starts jumping to extremes. I wonder if I shouldn't be taking this break. I think about how I could cut down on expenses. ...I imagine that just as I find my fit in this place, I'm ripped off the field because I have no money. Etc., etc. etc.

AAAAAhhhhh!

And just at the point when my thoughts were totally out of control, I caught myself. Me in all my drama.

And so I sat down to pray. I tried to take those thoughts captive, but I was mostly just grateful that the Spirit intercedes for us when our words come out as a jumbled mess (as mine often do when I'm stressed). I conceded that this was totally out of my control and if God wants me here, then He will have to provide.

Fast forward with me two hours later when I arrived at the office to receive another email from the lady in charge of my finances. (You probably already know where this is headed, right?) Yeah.

The subject line was "WOW!" and the rest went on to tell me how a friend of mine had sent a check for $400. The exact amount that I had requested!

2 hours....$400...a few tears...and 1 awestruck "me."

This was my morning.

In Case You Were Wondering...

1. I'm feeling better.
Still not up to 100% at this point, but definitely on the up and up as I can actually keep some food in my system. Yay!
Note to Self: 3 days of eating next to nothing is a good way to lose weight, but not so good for the energy level.

2. My mom is the greatest.
For my birthday she bought me a subscription to InStyle magazine and has been sending them to me on a monthly basis ever since. Today, after several very hot and dusty hours in the village, I returned to find a package from her sitting on my desk. Inside was a copy of the June edition of said magazine, some pictures (Sis, the pic of you and the dogs on Easter is adorable!), iced coffee mixes, and a charleston chew (the best candy in the history of the world!) Suffice it to say...I love my mom.

3. My staff is becoming like family.
I know I give them a bad rap at times (i.e. our arguments over whether or not to build a bathroom), but they really are great. Today as I was/am still recovering from the flu, my staff took care of me as if I were their own. I'm thinking our arguments are helping us grow together. And when you add the teasing and joking in the mix...well, basically I feel right at home.

4. Accuweather should NEVER be trusted.
I made the mistake of looking online yesterday at our week's forecast. I was expecting to see much the same--Sunny and Hot--but instead found a drastic drop in the temperature posted for Friday. And when I say "drastic" I mean we go from 110 to 87 degrees for the high. I didn't really believe it, but it said it (as I checked multiple times throughout the day), and with all my heart I wanted it to be true.

Much to my dismay, I checked back today. Everything about that forecast had changed. It's now saying 100 degrees for Friday. Disappointed? Yes. Realistic? For sure.

Accuweather, I so want to quit you.

5. No, I haven't read the latest book by the author of the Kite Runner.
I've received several emails from people asking me this as of late. Unfortunately, my answer is always the same as there isn't a copy to be found in this city to date. SOooo...if anyone wants to send it to me (hint, hint) I could get you an address. :)

Can you guess how my weekend ended and the new week began?

Let's just say good times were NOT had by all.

I really feel like writing something tonight but my mind is somewhat blank. I think it was caused by too much "24" viewing last night and the fact that I read "Split Ends" in one sitting today. (I also kind of feel like I've spent too much time alone today and wish someone were here to hang out with me as opposed to me typing my thoughts out on the computer.) But I digress...

I love doing nothing on the weekends. Actually, I really love doing nothing on the weekends here. (If I could, I would be at Target or Starbucks or hanging out with friends as I type.) But here, weekends mean something different.

Here weekends mean that I don't have to put on my 5 layers of clothing to walk out into the sun-scorching heat. Weekends are days that I don't have to deal with people staring or making comments as I walk to my destination (unless, of course, I choose to go out). Weekends here mean that I don't have to flip on the switch in my brain that translates everything into the local language. Weekends here mean it's just me being me.

Short sleeves...no head covering...English all day...and nobody commenting on the fact that I'm a foreigner (as if I needed a reminder).

I love weekends. It's too bad they only come around 2 days a week. :)

Today...

We laughed.
We cried.
And we threw some awesome water balloons.
It was great.

As far as I know, they are letting me return next week which, I think, is a good sign.

So you are probably wondering what could be better than a day filled with laughter and water balloon fights?...

One that ends by me returning to my office to find an AMAZING package from BFF, that's what! Complete with the most perfect green purse, a new book, an US Weekly magazine, Twizzlers, and peanut M&M's (the "Tear and Share" kind--although I don't feel much like "sharing" today), Tricks proved, yet again, how well she knows me.
(Thanks Tricks! ...And K, for your note!)

This was the perfect start to my weekend.

Now I have to get home because Wednesday nights we are watching Season 5 of "24."
And I hate to admit it, but I'm shamefully addicted.

You know it's a good day at work when you get to toss around a soccer/volleyball with a 65 year old village lady. Of course, this happened indoors so as not to let the men see us laughing and having fun. But what do they care?!

From what I can tell, I'm beginning to cause quite the stir in DS village. The kids are anxiously awaiting my arrival. The mothers are asking me to teach them volleyball and how to play with their children.

And I'm left thinking one of two things:
1.This could be the beginning of the end.
Or...
2. This could be something really big.

As far as I know, all I've got is today. So why not make the most of it?

You want to know what's on tap for Wednesday (when I return to this particular location)?

...Water Balloons. :)

My weekend...

Wednesday: I started my weekend a little early because...
Little D turned 2! It was a great day filled with cupcakes, lots of toy trucks, a soccer ball, and a new tricycle to enjoy. Man, I LOVE this little guy!


Thursday: Homemade tortillas and tacos for dinner. Mmmm.

Friday: We hosted fellowship in the morning and then I spent the afternoon baking cupcakes, writing emails, and sewing up my head covering.

In the evening, my new friends (albeit temporary friends) came over for a night of great conversation, coffee and playing in the fountain!! Yay!

Now, it's back to the grind as a new work week is upon me...

No longer young and not that pretty...

I've been stalking the flickr scene as of recent. I am LOVING all the cool photography people are posting and the creative challenges you can find within.

One day I stumbled upon this group.

The challenge itself seemed simple enough.

Take off your makeup. Take a picture. Then post. The guidelines say you're supposed to do so without the help of editing. Yet by the looks of the posted photographs, I'd like to think that those people didn't really read the instructions. (Either that or they are just incredibly beautiful...or they've got really cool cameras...or they know how to make the most of their lighting...or ???)

I should probably stop with my excuses now and get back to my point (if I even have one).

So last week I was all inspired. I thought of how I really don't wear that much makeup so it shouldn't be that big of deal. I thought of how I live in this place and rarely "make myself presentable."

I was not afraid. This would just be the raw...*real* me. No big deal.

No big deal for some, maybe!

Let's just say I've had this picture for over a week and am still hesitant to post. But that's definitely me, alright. With no makeup. (And apparently no visible eyelashes, either.) Shhh....

But what I've found most challenging in completing this task has very little to do with my looks. (OK, that part is somewhat challenging. I'll spare you all the details of my critical self, but I thought I should insert utter honesty here.) I see this "me" everyday.

The challenging part has come in the form of questions.

Questions like:
Why is it hard for me to let people see this? Why do I care? What am I afraid of? A lot of you have seen this "bare" side of me before. And some of you have even seen worse (i.e. when I'm sick).

It's hard for me to unpack it all, really. There's so much here. So much I'm thinking about and growing in.

But I feel it for myself....and for His Body. This need to be seen. To be real. To come without pretenses and still be accepted. I see it in the world around me. This desire to be loved even when we are at our worst. To be known for what's underneath all those layers.

Imagine what kind of world we would live in if everyone would literally "take off their makeup."

Frankly, I think we'd all see how very frail and broken we really are. Each and every one of us. We'd see those freckles...invisible eyelashes...aging lines...etc. We'd see that no one really has it all together. And that we are all just a little bit afraid that who we are will be based off of all that we are not.

I think it's a lie that Satan has used for a very long time to deceive God's children and His Body.

And so this is my challenge to you, my faithful readers...

Take off your makeup. (Literally and figuratively)
Go ahead.
And not just for yourself. But for those around you.
Post a picture. Share your heart. Be real.

The response might surprise you.

I'm growing more convinced the vulnerability begets vulnerability. And that *this* is exactly how God wants it to be.

May we encourage each other today in our strengths and our weaknesses as we grow together to become more like Him...

(Of course, every now and then, a little makeup can't hurt. After they've seen the real you.) ;)

Today I was the Pied Piper of SZ village.

I'm not kidding.

Everywhere I went, kids were coming out of the woodwork (or, more accurately stated, their mud homes) to play with me. It was as if I were playing some magical flute or pushing a snow cone cart (Oooh...now that would be a hit!).

But I wasn't. I was just available.

Available to tell stories...to teach songs...to play tag...and to love on these precious little ones who bring my heart so much joy.

It's funny to think that I wasn't really sure what to expect going into this time. Honestly, last week I caused quite the scene. And frankly, the men in this country aren't particularly keen on women causing scenes (or being seen, for that matter)...especially women of the foreign kind.

It looks as though all of that knee-work being done for me to have favor in the eyes of these people is being answered. And to top it all off, I think I may have already launched that kids program I've been dreaming of for the past 5 years...without even trying.

I love it when Dad surprises me like this!

Oh, that I would be open to His leading in the ebbs and flows, twists and turns of this crazy journey we call "life."

I still have nothing to say, but I thought I'd bore you all with some more randomness until inspiration strikes again.

*Right now I have my iTunes on shuffle. I didn't realize, but my music selection is extremely eclectic. And I'm finding it rather unfortunate that "shuffle" doesn't have a brain. I just went from the Indigo Girls to Chris Tomlin to some Christmas selection (oh how I wish it were time for that again). Anyway, that's NOT a good combination.

iTunes, I'm disappointed in you.

*Right now Accuweather says it's 102 degrees outside. On Tuesday it's supposed to be 110. I can hardly wait. ...For a break, that is.

*Speaking of which, I'm heading out of here in ONE month for a little vacation. I wasn't going to, but it's partly a team retreat (which means that part is paid for) and then I'm taking a few days at the end for alone time. I don't know who I was trying to kid, thinking I could be here for 8 months straight without a break?! Ha! I find that I'm already dreaming of air conditioning, Starbucks, short sleeves, and a hair cut. Just a little bit longer, I keep telling myself.

*I got in an argument/discussion with my staff today during our weekly meeting. They all want to build a bathroom for our use in this one particular village. It's going to cost approximately $100. Not that much, right? ...Right. Except there's principle involved.

When I asked them if the other people will be able to use it, they replied with a resounding "no."

You see, no one in the village has a bathroom either. They go out to their yard or the mountain or field or ??? And now my staff wants to come in and build one for ourselves, that no one else can use??? Are you kidding me?

They followed that up by telling me that next we will also build bathrooms for everyone else. That was, until I informed them that we don't have it in the budget to do so this year.

Grrr.

We are out there one or twice a week whereas the villagers LIVE under those conditions 24/7.

Of course, I'd like a bathroom as much as they would. But what kind of an example will this set??

Moments like these make me wish I could resign as their "boss" and simply be their "friend." They are really not going to like me if I tell them no.

Dear Void,
I need some advice.

*To end on a lighter note, you may have noticed I changed my blog header. Yep. Next thing you know, I'm going to be designing for Mac. (Ha!) Seriously though, does anyone know how to change the dimensions? It's rather large, I believe. But at least it's something different to look at. :)

So I really haven't much to say these days. I wish I did. I wish I had some profound words to share. Some deep insights into my soul to offer up to those curious enough to read. Some thought provoking ideas.

But I don't.

I've got nothing.

I am happy to report, however, that the past few days have been better than my last post would lead you to believe. So I thought I'd change things up on here a bit with a little list of the "GOOD"...

*After 3 days without electricity, our power finally returned. Thus, allowing me to turn on a fan. Which, in turn, allowed me to sleep at night. PTL!

*My friends from the coffee shop made the decision not to re-open. (That's the NOT good news.) BUT, in doing so, they had a little garage sale and I was able to buy a few things to make my room WAY more livable (not to mention, cute).

And since The Crushing One posted pics of her rockin' new curtains and The Creative One posted pics of her AMAZING house, I thought I'd give you a little insight into my room... (A & N-I thought you'd like to see how these things are being put to use.)

~The crate book shelf and olive green pillows...perfect for reading.








~The old door matched perfectly and makes a cool picture frame. (Not to mention adds a little color to my very WHITE walls. ---White walls not my choice, mind you.)






~And lastly, what was once used as a condiments table, is now enjoying this corner position and serving a mighty purpose as the place for "all things creative." Now all I need is a stool. :)





And there are other "GOOD" things I could post, but I think I'll save those for a different day. I'm really tired right now and am heading home for the night.

Thanks for dropping by...

This morning, after 24 hours without power and a very hot and restless night of sleep, I walked down to the kitchen to return some dishes I had left in my room the day prior. It was 5:30am and I couldn't sleep any longer.

Three steps in and the next thing I know I'm practically doing the splits. My foot had slipped on a huge puddle of water that appeared courtesy of the refrigerator defrosting. My leftover coffee from the day before was left dripping down the side of the wall and I found myself sitting in said puddle.

NOT the best start to my day. I wondered if it was too late to turn around and start over.

5:30am + lack of sleep + falling + spilled coffee= a not so happy strawberry blonde

But this, too, shall pass...

The Creative One left a comment for me on my last post, promising that she would go for a drive and to Starbucks, if I would go to the village here and sing songs with the kids and make them laugh.

T, thanks for the challenge and perspective. Today I did just that. (Well, ok. Not so much the singing part. But I did make them laugh hysterically as I chased them up and down the dusty path playing a wicked game of "tag" for over an hour.)

I now have a village of mothers who love me (even though they can't understand how I'm better with their children than they are since I don't have any of my own) and about 50 kids who were all yelling my name and waving goodbye as we drove away this afternoon.

Ahh, *this* is what I was created for.

This past week was difficult in many ways. And honestly, the rain continues to pour. But tonight, at least, my heart is full.

Imagining...

Right now I'm wishing I could get in a car and go for a drive.

By myself.

Somewhere other than here.

I'd pick up a Starbucks' Iced Caramel Macchiato on my way out of town. And as I pulled away, I'd roll down my windows and blare my music. Nobody would stare at me because I didn't have my head covered. However, they might stare because I'd be singing rather loudly to whatever came on my iPod.

I'd drive and drive until the cares of the world faded away. And then I'd stop.

I'm guessing my car would eventually lead me back to the patio on Broadway Place, where I'd gather around a fire pit with friends for the rest of the evening. Star-gazing. Talking. Laughing. Drinking. Eating. Enjoying.

Of course I know this is not my reality. But it's summer here and this is what I'm imagining. A girl can dream, ok?

So I was walking to the office this morning and I could have sworn I smelled someone brewing a fresh pot of Starbucks. I promise. Of course, I know this couldn't possibly be the case. But it got me thinking.

I bet if I were stranded in the desert, my mirage would be Starbucks coffee as opposed to a pool of water.

Frightening? Maybe.

Telling? Most definitely.

It's Saturday evening. I just finished the first day of our work week. My head is hurting and it's time to take de-worming medicine.

Some days I like living here more than others.

While the Crushing One was here, we took many a "walking tour" around town. Here's a sampling of what we saw...

On our way back from the mosque we passed by this elderly man squatting in a doorway. I wasn't going to ask, but he was too cute to resist. I went back and kindly requested his permission to take his picture and he said, "Why not?" He then asked what we were doing, walking back and forth every day. (Geesh, are we that noticeable?!) And for the record...it wasn't every day, just the two days prior.





If you were to walk down this alleyway, you'd find my house. At the end, with the blue gate. On your way, you'd walk under grape vines (on the left) and pomegranate trees (on the right). If you time it just right, the neighbors might even invite you in for tea or dinner or a birthday party of some random relative. I love this alley, for at the end, I always find refuge.


If you look to the right after you pass the blue glass shop, you'll see this street. With the blue sky peeking out from atop the mud tunnel, this is one of my favorite views in the entire city.







Last, but not least, we saw these three boys. They never let go, but one boy did look back to see what I was up to. Ahh, childhood. When the days seem to go on forever and life is really, really good.

Me and my shadow....










More to come when the sun stops shining and my shadow is gone....